Wednesday, June 6, 2007

ahh!!!
thursday tomorrow!!! so it begins, the start of holidays soon..
(:
today has been pretty good, had a good time with sexy aka frances.. she says, when she sees me, she get high and goes crazy and does random things.. why? because i get high with her.. haha!! isnt that cool? i like people to feel happy hanging out with me.. makes me feel good too.. haha..
ooh! record today.. wore spaghetti out and didnt wear a jacket until i got to the air conditioned room in school..
(:
FIRST TIME EVER!!!
i did feel uneasy for awhile though.. haha.. but anyways! haha.. that was that..

lessons were the usual and had a good time during database lesson because we were chatting and all..
after school, accompanied peggy while she waited for her mum.. talked talked talked..
then headed to toapayoh to meet edmund.. ended up at the bus stop near his house then met him there and took the bus down to novena together.. went to starbucks and mugged.. good time spent with edmund.. he's amazingly nice to mug with.. haha.. we had a couple of short breaks in between and chatted about Christian stuff.. talking to him about Christian stuff is really cool.. almost similar to the way timo talks about such stuff too.. discussions are such love..
(:
so we mugged, he borrowed my laptop to reply for some report while i was just stoning practically the entire time.. didnt study much at all.. all i did was re-copy the stuff i wrote in class that was so messy.. i couldnt even see what i wrote.. haha!!! i think, i think, i might fail tomorrow's paper..
O.O
haha.. not good i must say. not good at all..

on the way back, i saw a star..
then i was reminded of the times when night fell and i'd look out my window and stare at the skies, looking for more than 5 or 10 stars.. know why?
i used to count and tell God, saying if there would be more than x number of stars, hongtat and i might be together.. haha.. but i always lose count..
now, i count them and just smile, knowing that the stars will be just a fixture in the skies and even if i do count them, i'd simply think,
"someday soon, someone who deserves me and vice versa, will come by.."
(:
isnt that good? changing the things that remind me of him, the things that i do that reminds me of him.. oh yes, i've already moved on.. i'm moving on to the better things in life.. but i dont think he knows that.. he's so yester-year.. haha..
looking back, i dont know why i liked him so so much.. i dont think i was blind, or that i made the wrong choice.. neither am i saying that i made the right choice of liking him.. i just, made one of what i'd call 'correct mistake'.. oxymoron i know.. but by making this mistake, i've come to know much of God's grace for me.. how real He is in this life of mine.. if i didnt make this mistake, i'd probably never knew more of God's grace and how love might actually be.. to experience those non-stop beating and breathlessness.. knowing now that my feelings were wasted, i've probably learnt to give my heart to the right person instead of simply following my heart and not going according to God's word.. so yes, i'd call this a 'correct mistake'
haha..
(:

i just wonder now, who's the person who i might give my heart to.. i wonder if i might even be able to give my heart to anyone other than God Himself..
i guess time will tell.. haha.. how cliched isnt it.. but that is probably the truth..

ahh, what else can i say.. nothing much isnt it? havent had a lot of things to talk about recently.. i'd probably have pictures to show and talk about either tomorrow or after my trip.. wont be blogging from friday to monday.. cant wait for church camp.. haha..

going out with sexy and shuwei tomorrow after school, might be skipping lan lessons since there's only lecture to do.. oh wells.. haha..
have been feeling rather sleepy towards 2300 so i think i'm going to take my leave now and leave you guys with a song.. take care always my darlings!
(:

take that
shine

you, you're such a big star to me
you're everything i wanna be
but you're stuck in a hole and i want you to get out
i dont know what there's to see
but i know it's time for you to leave
we're all just pushing along
trying to figure it out

all your anticipation pulls you down
when you can have it all, you can have it all

so come on, so come on, get it on
i dont know what you're waiting for
your time is coming dont be late, hey hey
so come on
see the light on your face
let it shine
just let it shine
let it shine

stop, being so hard on yourself
it's not good for your health
i know that you can change
so clear your head and come round

you only have to open your eyes
you might just get a big surprise
and it may feel good
and you might just want to smile smile smile

dont let your demons pull you down
cause you can have it all, you can have it all

so come on, so come on, get it on
dont know what you're waiting for
your time is coming dont be late, hey hey
so come on
see the light on your face
let it shine
just let it shine
let it shine

hey, let me know you
you're all that matters to me
hey let me show you
you're all that matters to me

hey let me love you
you're all that matters to me
hey so come on yeah
shine all your light over me


vanessa