Monday, October 27, 2008
replies:
yuan: oh shut up you skinny butthead! and yes, it was HIS death wish. think he wants to be one when he grows a little older.
zhaowei:not worth reply i realised.
HAHA!!!
bwcqiqi: haha!!! THANK GOODNESS!!! but T.T. isnt THAT bad isnt it? pretty interesting for initials. HAHA!
(:
anyways! it's the end of monday and i'm feeling so dreary.. yet, i have reasons to be happy. haha. what contradiction..
i am, currently, quite literally, "full of shit"
haha!!! i honestly think the time of the month is coming, hence the extra weight around my hips.. should be around now i guess since october is nearly over..
-sulks-
periods are the bane of my life!!!
-yawns-
over the weekend, with shaowei & melvin, alot of things has been going around in my mind.
you know, its really funny, when you meet a long-time-no-see friend and within
an hour of the conversation, OH WAIT! let's scratch that and replace it with... 10 minutes. so yes, within 10 minutes of the conversation, you're asked this simple question.
"GOT ____FRIEND ALREADY?!"
(circle the appropriate words GIRL/BOY)
and always, MY answer, is NO.
i mean, obviously, i cant say things like "more often than not, i say NO" right?
so, the whole talk of my love-life's history comes into the picture and they go on and on about it.. please do not be mistaken, i dont mind talking about my past because i dont see why i should avoid what i've been through.. it doesnt mean also, that i absolutely LOVE talking about my past either.. i'm, neutral.
(:
so, outside esplanade, they started talking about my love-life, matching me up with random people that they know, or, and, saying i'm bisexual and stuff. haha!
then they came to the topic of my religion, about me, always insisting that i have to date a Christian.. you could say i'm hard-headed or stubborn.. but although i wish i could always love someone who's a non-Christian, i know there will be times when there is this special person that would come by and i'd start wondering if he could be the one and all. then it's just all a matter of converting the guy.. yet at the same time, i know, the conversion to Christianity wouldnt be based on his own conviction and really believing in God, in Jesus, but because he feels the need to convert because of me.. that's the only misgiving i have about dating a non-Christian.
of course i know too, that there are special cases where after dating, the non-believing party honestly becomes a Christian because he/she has been touched by God and sincerely believes.
of course i wish i could date freely, date anyone that i find favour with.. but this, is a personal choice and a personal commitment that i have brought myself to, to follow my religion and trust that God will bring me someone who will lead me, who will love me, who is believes in Him.
it gets hard sometimes, when feelings override the logical thinking and i just want to, "follow my feelings"
it isnt a big issue to me when they ask me about my relationship status but like most humans, i long for the comfort of someone to hold and love..
life, gets hard sometimes but i guess, patience is the only thing i've got attain isnt it..
alrights. more some time soon. loves.
vanessa.c
